Boo Halloween
Halloween is dumb.
I’m fairly certain that I didn’t like Halloween when I was a kid - I just saw it as an excuse to get sick off candy (I wonder why I’m worried about diabetes…hmmm).
I came by my loathe for Halloween honestly. I remember being maybe 13 when my mom first showed me how to detract trick-or-treaters (outside and inside lights off, hide in basement).
I don’t understand how this crazy ancient Celtic pagan holiday (Samhain - the festival of livestock slaughter, bonfires and masks that signified the end of the harvest season) became the entire month of October. There is a house in our neighborhood that has a whole graveyard, a couple of dementors on the edges of the driveway and zombies littering their yard. Some people put more effort into the “Halloween Season” than they do to taking care of their yard.
Now, I certainly don’t have kids and I might feel differently if I did (seeing my 14-month old niece dressed as a monkey…pretty cute), but since I don’t, I avoid Halloween at every turn. The last time I dressed up was about 7 years ago when both Alli and I put on afro wigs and horrible flannel shirts and went as “Bob Ross”.
Overall, I can’t put a big reason on why I don’t like Halloween…I just think it’s a waste of time and a contributor to early juvenile diabetes and obesity. I think we have a big enough problem with that as it is.
Flame away.
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Friday Blogthing - Monster Mash
Finally, I get a different one than Emaw. I’m doing this, but I want to make sure that all still understand that I Hate Halloween. Why does it have to be a girl werewolf?
You Are a Werewolf
You’re unpredictable, moody, and downright freaky. You seem sweet and harmless, until you snap. Then you’re a total monster. Very few people can predict if you’re going to be Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. But for you, all your transformations seem perfectly natural.
Your greatest power: Your ability to tap into nature
Your greatest weakness: Lack of self control
You play well with: Vampires
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Why I Hate Halloween
Thank the Lord it’s November. That means that the worst of all holidays is over.
I loathe Halloween.
All year long we teach children that you should never take candy from strangers, yet one night every year, we throw that rule out the window and encourage them to walk around unsupervised ASKING for candy from strangers. It doesn’t teach kids anything and dentists’ offices across the country are filled with requests to fill cavities on this sugar-filled holiday.
Alli and I are pretty lame (by society’s standards) when it comes to this holiday. We never buy candy. We shut off our lights. Or we leave. The first year we were in our house, we bought candy and waited anxiously to give it out.
We had TWO trick-or-treaters. TWO.
So we ended up eating all the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups we had bought and watched TV. Those Peanut Butter Cups went straight to my gut and I don’t know if it has ever recovered.
These days, we don’t buy candy anymore. Some call us ‘Scrooge’, we don’t really care. We won’t apologize for our disdain for this manufactured “holiday” and you won’t see us celebrating it anytime soon.
What amazed me was this: I went to CVS Pharmacy to pick up some medicine for Alli and they were putting out the Christmas stuff. That’s just nuts.
But at least the crappy orange and black stuff is being put away.
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Finally
2004 has gone fast. I can’t believe that there is snow on the ground already and Christmas is right around the corner. Winter is by far my favorite time of year.
I do, however, try to keep a consistent schedule of how I celebrate this time of year. All while I was growing up, my family never set up our tree before Thanksgiving (a tradition I had to break this year because of the busyness of this particular season). The day after Turkey Day (or Leftover Turkey Day), we would drag the artificial pine out of storage and decorate it, signifying the beginning of the holiday season in our household.
Each year, it seems like people are celebrating Christmas earlier and earlier. This October, I was at Target picking something up (I don’t remember what, but it could have been ANYTHING - you can get EVERYTHING at Target) and I saw “right next to the Halloween stuff“ Christmas stuff.
In October.
Before Halloween.
That’s a little ridiculous.
I know that these companies are trying to make a buck and all, but it seems like eventually, we’ll start celebrating only 2 holidays - Christmas and Valentine’s Day. Those are the two largest money-makers for retailers. Those will be the holidays that they force us to celebrate.
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